Every Win Something?

Normally when you win something it comes to you free, right? Ok, so play along with me here for a moment and all will come clear.

You see, I keep getting these calls from automated telemarketers for everything from paying too much interest on my credit cards to the warranty on my car running out. Yesterday the automated call was ever so slightly different. I've had this call before so I knew what was coming so I decided to have fun with it. This time I wasn't being told how I could save money, I was told I won a trip for 4, all expenses paid to Barbados! Yes, an all expenses paid vacation! Wow, lucky me!

Uh huh, not so much, you see, I've listened to the rest of this spiel before! Someone who shops at Macy's, Eaton's, Sears or some other such store entered my name for this competition. Yep, sure they did, first I don't know anyone who shops at any of these types of stores, second none of these stores exist in this little hick town I live in, so I know that wasn't true! As this automated telemarketer was saying her thing, I started making comments and I asked a question and that's when it happened!

Before I get into the question that I asked, let me ask you how rude does a person need to be in order to get an automated telemarketer to hang up on you? Let me remind you, this telemarketer is AUTOMATED, that means that it's a recording! You didn't think you could be rude enough to have a recording hang up on YOU did you? Well, it's possible, and this is how it's done. See, you have to listen to their nonsense at least once to fully know what it is they are trying to get from you, then the next time you call, you play!

Yeah yeah yeah, I know it's automated what's the point in playing? Well guess what!?! Even automated calls have real live operators listening in just waiting to pounce as soon as you press the right number! Oh yes they do, don't tell me I'm full of it! How do you think that an automation can hang up on you if there weren't someone listening in, hmmmmmmm?

Anyway, I'm rambling so back to my point. Yesterday I got this call that I had won a trip to Barbados, all expenses paid no less! The thing of it is though, what I learned having previously listened to this rabble was that this trip I supposedly won was going to cost me $99.99 per person, plus I'd have to drive down to New York City in order to claim my prize. Nice free trip, huh!?!

So my question to this automation was "Yep, a FREE trip to Barbados and all it was going to cost me was a 2 day drive, the hotel bill for staying the night on the way there, $99.99 per person and then whatever costs were incurred while in New York before I can even claim my prize, right?" Well, that's what I WAS going to ask, but the line went dead when I got to the "and all it's going to cost me part". Apparently the person listening in wasn't too happy that I was aware that in order to collect this "prize" I had to pay a small fortune! I hadn't even mentioned that I'd have to get a passport for myself along with whoever I was going to take along!

So, do you think I was rude? I don't think so, I think I was just having fun. It's my right as a citizen to be able to have fun even at the expense of an automation :D I do so enjoy seeing just how long one of these automated calls takes before it hangs up on me. I have to admit sometimes I can't be rude enough, sometimes, just sometimes, I'm the one who ends up doing the hanging up as the person listening in must be enjoying the joke more than me! 

Cream Soup and Char

Quirky challenged me to write a re-do of Green Eggs and Ham, and well, I accepted her challenge! She's already posted hers earlier today and did a wonderful job of it, I suggest you go and check out what she's writ! Unfortunately mine doesn't rhyme anywhere near so nicely as hers does, but in my defense, it's incredibly hard to incorporate the food items on our menu with a Dr. Seuss rhyme...lol. By the way, tell Quirky I sent you if you haven't been there yet :D

Green Eggs and Ham, changed to Cream Soup and Char

By Dr. Seuss and transposed to work for work by Skye :D

I are Skye 
I are Skye 
Skye I are 

That Skye-I-are!
That Skye-I-are!
I do not like
that Skye-I-are! 

Do you like
Cream soup and Char?

I do not like them,
Skye-I-are.
I do not like
Cream soup and Char.

Baked Onion Soup,
Sirloin Steak?

Teriyaki Chicken 
Caesar?
Jambalaya,
Quesadilla?
I do not like them,
Skye-I-are.

Would you like them
in a house?
Would you like them
with a mouse?

I do not like them 
in a house.
I do not like them 
with a mouse.
I do not like Cream soup and Char.
I do not like them, Skye-I-are.

Would you, could you
In a car?
Eat them! Eat them!
Here they are.

You may like them.
You will see.
You may like them
in a tree!

I would not, could not in a tree.
Not in a car! You let me be.

A Wrap! A Wrap!
A Wrap! A Wrap!
Could you, would you,
Eat a Wrap?

Won’t eat that crap! Not in a tree!
Not in a car! Skye! Let me be!

Say!
In the dark?
We keep it dark!
Would you, could you, in the dark?

I would not, could not,
in the dark.

Would you, could you, in the rain?

I would not, could not,
in the rain.
You do not like
Cream soup and Char?

I do not
like them,
Skye-I-are.

I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them ANYWHERE!

I do not like
Cream soup
and Char!

I do not like them,
Skye-I-are.

You do not like them.
So you say.
Try them! Try them!
And you may.
Try them and you may, I say.

Skye!
If you will let me be,
I will try them.
You will see.

Say!
I like Cream soups and Char!
I do! I like them, Skye-I-are!
Perhaps I’d like Baked Onion Soup,
Sirloin Steak, Teriyaki Chicken Caesar,
Jambalaya, Quesadilla!

And I will eat them in the rain.
And in the dark. And on a train.
And in a car. And in a tree.
They are so good, so good, you see!

And I will eat them here and there.
Say! I will eat them ANYWHERE!

I do so like
Cream soups and Char!
Thank you!
Thank you,
Skye-I-are!

Wakey Wakey Silv!

Ok, so today is my b-day and Silv was absolutely clueless! Hmmm, perhaps I should tell you the story from the beginning.

The first thing I do on a morning that I’m not working, is check my e-mail. Silv had been up for a while already and I had gotten my coffee and first cigarette of the day when I logged on to check the mail. First message of the day came from Quirky, not a b-day message as she didn’t know, but just a note about her challenge to me in regards to Dr. Seuss posts. I’ll be putting that one up later today. The other message was a “Happy Birthday from MSWorld!”

So I say’s to Silv, I say’s “Aww, ain’t that sweet, MSWorld sent me a birthday message.”

And he says, “Isn’t that nice.”

Nothin’ else, no Happy Birthday Skye, no nothin’ nada, zip, zilch, no acknowledgement on it at all! Now that really doesn’t bother me, I couldn’t care less about birthdays, but I waited for the light to come on anyway. Well, it didn’t!

Almost 2 hours later, Becca comes in (she and I had been sleeping under the stars last night by the fire), and she asked me when I came in. I told her that it had been at midnight last night because the ground was hurting these old bones of mine.

Then she asked me, get this “Are you ready for your presents?”

And Silv says, “Presents? Is it your birthday? Oh, it is your birthday! Happy Birthday!”

And I say’s, “It only took you 2 hours to clue in Silv, you’re such a Maroon! Why do you think that MSWorld sent me a Happy Birthday Wish?” I was laughing the whole time I said this of course :D

And he say’s, “It just totally went over my head, just whooooosh, right over. It never dawned on me that you’d get a birthday wish because it’s your birthday!”

And so Becca gave me a card that she made out of foamy art supply stuff, some beads, specifically leaves, a rose, a butterfly and a ladybug, and topped it off with a heart sticker. No words, just a nice scene of flowers, bushes and trees. She also made me a bookmark using a large star bead tied to a friendship bracelet with heart beads tied in at the bottom. She made this in all my favorite colors! Last but not least, she made me a Morocco Drum, so I used it right away and played the “Happy Birthday to me” song. It really was sweet of her, she always makes me my gifts and cards. 

And still we laughed at Silv for not remembering my birthday. Granted, the only birthday we ever really celebrate is Becca’s, but she’s been talking about mine non-stop for the last week now, and Silv just never clued in. 

To be honest, this has got to be the funniest birthday morning I have ever enjoyed!