Space Age Coffee

Well, my coffee maker went on the fritz and so I had to buy a new one.  I thought about doing what I usually do and get a second hand one for anywhere between $5 & $15, but couldn't find a 12 cup one this time around.  The reason I tend to get second hand coffee makers is that the last couple of times I had bought new, they lasted about a month and then died.  The twice used ones tended to last around 3 or 4 years.  Seemed like the smarter choice to me...lol.

Anywhoo's-it, I ended up buying new this time.  It retails (according to looking it up on-line) for $99.  The store I bought it at was selling them for $79.99, but this particular box had a sales ticket on it for $49.99.  I decided to get it.  What I hadn't noticed was that there was a second sales ticket on it for $34.99.  When I went to pay, that's the price that came up and I damn near shouted "Whoohoooo" due to the great price for a top-notch model coffee maker, brand named "Oster"!

This coffee maker is so high-tech that I actually had to read the manual to see how to set up the clock and timer.  I got it all set up, ran plain water through it in accordance to directions and then proceeded to brew my first pot of coffee.  This machine is GREAT!  That was the best cup of coffee I've ever had in my life! (At least in regards to plain coffee, that is).  So now I'm the proud owner of a top-of-the-line coffee maker and I got it on the cheap. Damn I'm proud of myself :D.

After all was said and done, and I was half-way through the pot of coffee, Silv came into my kitchen to get himself a cup.  He had been sleeping up to this point, and hadn't even known that I had gone out to get a new machine.  When he saw my new kitchen toy, he said, "This machine needs a space ship built around it!"  He looked at it, played with the buttons for a bit, noticed that the clock had 120 minutes on it and asked what that was all about.  "Well," say's I, "That's not technically the clock." I pressed a button below the timer and the actual clock appeared showing the correct time.  "What was that on the display then?" he asked.  "That, my dear sweet kitchen slut, is the fresh brew timer.  It shows you just how long it took to brew the pot of coffee, and lets you know also how long it's been on the warmer for.  Once the minute hand reaches 120 minutes, it shuts the machine off.  It even warns you that it's doing so by ringing a bell."

Fast forward a bit and Silv and I are playing on our computers, as we are wont to do.  The coffee pot was empty, so he brewed another.  As he's doing this, I just had to laugh!  I suppose he was turning it on when all I heard coming from the kitchen was "Engage!"  Once the bell rang to let us know that the pot was done brewing he decided to be nice and go get us each a cup.  Now I was laughing even harder!  Coming from the kitchen were the sounds of Star Trek! "Oster, Folgers, 2 cups, black, hot!"   

Silv was so impressed by this coffee maker, that he went out to the store and bought himself one.  

Ooooohhhh, I almost forgot!  Silv decided to read the manual as well, only he went so far as to read the troubleshooting pages.  I hadn't done that!  Oh man did he start to laugh!  "This page must have been written for blondes" say's he, "The possible causes and solutions are even repeated for those that have bleached their hair blonde!"

"What are you talking about?" I ask, "Here, read", he says.  And so I read:

Problem: The "Brew Now" light does not light up.

Possible Cause #1:  The appliance is unplugged

Solution: Plug unit in!

Possible Cause #2: There's a power outage.

Solution: Wait for power to be restored!

Problem: The coffee is not brewing.

Possible Cause #1: The appliance is unplugged

Solution: Plug unit in!

Possible Cause #2: There's a power outage.

Solution: Wait for power to be restored.

Possible Cause #3: The decanter is not completely on the warming plate.

Solution: Place decanter on warmer plate!

Problem: The coffeemaker only brews water.

Possible Cause: There are no coffee grounds in the filter basket.

Solution: Add coffee grounds!

Problem: The filter basket overflows.

Possible Cause #1: The decanter is not completely on the warmer plate.

Solution: Place decanter on warmer plate!

Possible Cause #2: The decanter lid is not on decanter.

Solution: Place lid on decanter.

Problem: The coffee is not hot.

Possible Cause #1: There's a power outage.

Solution: Wait for power to be restored.

Possible Cause #2: Auto Shut-Off has been activated.

Solution: For best results brew a fresh pot.

You just gotta wonder if there really are people out there that can't figure things like this out for themselves!  I made mention of that to Silv when he reminded me of my very own sister.  He said "Um, Skye, don't you remember your sister calling you last winter?  First she asked if your power was out too, to which you said 'yes' and then she asked you to check the computer to see if school was cancelled, did she not?  And just how were you to do that, when the power was out?"

*Insert Homer Simpson forehead slap here* DOH I guess I just had my very own blonde moment!