A Bit Of A Rant With A Twist

 In mid December I had been at the local phone center in order to pay my phone and internet bills. I patiently waited for my turn to come as there were 3 people in there before me and only one cashier. So, while waiting and because I had just gotten off of a long hard day of work, I sat in one of the chairs provided for just such situations. Finally my turn came up and I gave the cashier my bills and was starting to pull out the amount of cash I needed in order to pay them.

In walks a man, I recognized him immediately. Even if I hadn't turned to look, I would have known who it was by the sound of his steps and his loud booming voice saying "This new cell phone gave me problems as soon as I got across the border!"

You see, this man was my father. He saw me, walked past me, without touching me managed to get me to back up a few steps so he could do his complaining and get his phone re-set up  so that it would work the way it was supposed to when he traveled into the United States for work. I nonchalantly walked around him and leaned onto the counter turning to look at him. He looked over at me with an expression of "I know this person, but not who she is or why I should", you all know the look.

He continued on with his business which took about 20 perhaps 25 minutes while I stood there watching him waiting to be acknowledged. Not once did he apologize for butting in and cutting off my transaction, nor during all that time did he recognize me.

When he was finally done and walked out, I said "By dad" which he apparently did not hear as he just walked out the door without a further word. The cashier had stepped into a back room at that time and hadn't heard me either, but when he came back out, he was full of apologies for the rudeness of some customers. I looked at him and just said "What can you expect from a trucker? They're always the most important people around."

"How did you know he's a trucker?" The cashier asked me.

"Because he's my father and it's kind of hard not knowing what he does for work." I replied.

"He's your father and he didn't know you?" he asked me, completely incredulous.

"Yep!" I snorted, finished paying up and left.

Two weeks later I went to my parents house for their Christmas gathering. Dad came up to me right away, gave me a hug and welcomed me into his home. I kept my mouth shut at that point, I was waiting for everyone to show up and for just the right moment before I asked him how he recognized me when I walked in his door but he couldn't in a business.

Over the next little while everyone showed up that was coming and we all sat down to eat. While we ate dad brought up the subject of his phone and the fact that he had to get his cell service changed once again. He was relating the story in the shop, but not 100% accurately. I let him continue to tell his story and then I corrected him on a point he was trying to make. He looked at me all confused and asked me how I knew that. I just looked at him and asked him if he remembered the woman in a fleece lined jean jacket and gray toque standing beside him watching him for about 20 minutes. He said that yes, she had made him feel very uncomfortable. I asked if he had the feeling that he should have known her and again he answered in the affirmative still not realizing that I was describing myself. Mom looked at him and I could tell that she knew where I was going with this, everyone else  at the table had very confused expressions.

Finally dad asked again how I already knew all of this. Again, without answering, hoping he'd catch on but also hoping that he wouldn't, I asked him a few more questions which he answered still totally ignorant as to how I would know anything about this transaction of his.

After about half an hour of leaving him hanging I noticed more expressions changing from confusion to dawning understanding and decided to let him off the hook. So I said simply "The reason I know all this is because I was the woman standing beside you who you didn't recognize and whom you still couldn't figure out even with all the info I've been feeding you."

My mother looked horrified and all my siblings and in-laws laughed their fool heads off when they finally understood how the joke was on dad. And still dad didn't quite catch on so I got up from the table, put on my jacket and toque and asked him if he could still recognize me for who I am or if my disguise was too good. I was even wearing black pants like I had been on that day. A look of mortification and understanding came upon his face and he actually said sorry for not having realized that it had been me standing there that whole time. Needless to say he didn't apologize for cutting off my business by insisting that he was dealt with first, but that's part of his religious nature, men always come first and always will, all else are of no consequence.

I am still laughing at his stupidity in not realizing what had been going on with that conversation, and quite frankly, I don't think I'll ever let him forget it!